The NSPCC has revealed that in 2023/24, its Helpline service made 216 referrals to police and agencies such as social services after being contacted by adults in Northern Ireland concerned about the impact of a parent or carer’s alcohol or substance misuse on a child.
This is an average of more than four referrals every week.
The NSPCC makes a referral when concerns reported to its Helpline (which has a base in Belfast) are considered to be serious enough to warrant further investigation, or if it is felt that a family needs support.
According to the National Association for the Children of Alcoholics (Nacoa), which organises Children of Alcoholics Week (9 – 15 February), one in five children in the UK are affected by an adult’s drinking.
The NSPCC is joining with Nacoa to let children who are experiencing parental alcohol and substance misuse know that they are not alone, and that support is available.
Help is also available for parents or carers who are concerned about the impact of their own or another adult’s substance or alcohol misuse on a child.
Parents who regularly take drugs, drink, or both, in large quantities over a long period of time, can have chaotic, unpredictable lifestyles and may struggle to recognise and meet their children’s needs, increasing the risk of harm.
Although this does not necessarily mean that a child will experience abuse, it does make it more difficult for parents to offer safe and loving care. This can lead to abuse or neglect and have a serious impact on a child’s emotional wellbeing.
A parent or carer misusing alcohol and drugs can have negative effects on children at different stages in their lives. During pregnancy, drinking and drug use can put babies at risk of birth defects, premature birth, being born underweight and withdrawal symptoms.
In later years, parental substance and alcohol misuse can put children at risk of behavioural or emotional problems; poor attendance at school or low grades; physical and emotional abuse or neglect; or being exposed to criminal activity.
Across the UK, Childline delivered 4401 counselling sessions last year with children and young people from across the UK who were worried about their parent’s substance misuse.
One 13-year-old boy who contacted Childline said:
“Mum changes completely when she drinks: she shouts at everyone and can get violent. When this happens, I have to look after my younger siblings and protect them.
“It’s hard to live in an unstable home like this; I never know if she’ll be in a good mood or not.”
Kamaljit Thandi, NSPCC Helpline Director, says:
“Parental substance misuse can have a truly devastating impact on the lives of children and the effects can last long into adulthood.
“Parents and carers who drink or take drugs to excess may have difficulty looking after their children and responding to their needs. Some may lose consciousness, leaving no other responsible adult present to care for their child and ensure their safety.
“The stress upon children of having parents who misuse substances can cause impaired development and problems with learning and memory.
“While we want children to know they are not alone and there is help available to them, we all can play a part in looking out for potential signs of a child’s distress and the NSPCC Helpline is there to provide support for families who are struggling.”
Hilary Henriques MBE, Chief Executive of Nacoa, added:
“Imagine coming home from school and dreading what you might find. Imagine having no friends because you’re too embarrassed to bring them home in case Mum or Dad are drunk, or worse. You have no one to turn to because everyone denies there is a problem.
“When alcohol is the family secret, children and adults often believe that talking is being disloyal to their family and try to hide the problem from the outside world. Children often take on responsibility for their parent’s drinking and behaviour, believing it’s something they’ve done.
“Some children spend their childhoods trying to do the impossible; stop someone else drinking. Talking to someone who understands and doesn't judge can be lifesaving.
“When they know this is not their responsibility and that only the person drinking can make that choice, the burden of ‘failing’ is lifted from their shoulders, opening up an opportunity to live their own lives, irrespective of whether their parent continues to drink.”
The NSPCC and Nacoa want to remind children that it is not their fault if their parent or carer drinks, and they do not have to keep it a secret. It is not down to them to stop their drinking. They have the right to feel safe and loved at home and they do not have to cope alone.
Talking to someone they trust can help them see they are not alone and could help them find the support they need. They could try talking to a friend or someone else in the family, a teacher or school nurse or a doctor, or a Childline counsellor.
Talking about it does not mean they will get their parent into trouble, but if they are worried, they can speak to Childline confidentially. Childline is there 24 hours a day, free and in confidence on 0800 1111, or www.childline.org.uk
The NSPCC Helpline is available on 0808 800 5000 or help@nspcc.org.uk.
Nacoa’s Helpline is available for everyone affected by a parent or carer’s drinking – children, adults and professionals. They can be reached on 0800 358 3456 or at helpline@nacoa.org.uk.